Sorrowfully aesthetical

Haley asked me to create a love story featuring her crush, Mark. Then this one came, but she complained =)))

[1]

Buzz… Buzz…

I took the phone from the pocket of my blouse idly. It was a tiring day.

8.35 pm.

“Hello.”

“Happy birthday! Where are you now?”

“Oh, today’s my birthday? I’m in the hospital.”

“Gosh! What’ve you been doing all day long? You’re always up to your neck with tons of stuff. We’ve prepared a super big birthday party for you at home. What time will you be here with us?”

I never wanted to disappoint anyone, but I was in a dilemma then. I was too afraid of letting everyone down, especially this next-door neighbor, Haley. She was always lovely and caring while I was always on the go. Thanks to her family, our pet dog and my younger brother, Nick, were cared for thoroughly despite my tight schedule.

Then, I stopped for a while, thinking about what to add to my response.

“Hmmm… let me see. I’ve finished an operation… you know… it was tough, though. Maybe I’ll take a break for 5 minutes; afterward, I’ll drive back home… thank you so…”

Haley didn’t let me finish. She hung up.

Sighing, I put the phone down on the table. I’d better return home immediately as remorse had taken over me after all that incomplete conversation.

Even though I wasn’t told about the venue, “Comfy Breeze” popped into my mind. It was Haley’s coffee shop.  She had been running her own business right after high school graduation. And it was about 50 meters away from our house.

As soon as I ignited the engine, the phone rang again. But it wasn’t Haley or anyone else in my family. A strange number. Maybe my only wish for today was “no more calls from work, please.”

Then, it came true. I got a phone call from a scammer. It’s so hilariously fortunate.

To my surprise, Haley wasn’t angry when I opened the door. Instead, like everyone, she greeted me with a grin:

“We didn’t expect you to be this early. Now, come on… Everyone has been waiting… Make a wish!”

Embarrassingly, I replied:

“Good evening. Thank you everyone for everything.”

I clumsily took the birthday cake from her hands. Haley kept her smile.

Lou, our family’s pet, playfully waved his tiny tail while running around my feet.

There were only five people with a dog at the birthday party. My parents passed away in a pandemic years ago, which was the reason behind my decision to be a doctor. Without Haley’s assistance, my younger brother and I wouldn’t be this great.

Haley was always full of beans and helpful as her parents. They were all here. Sometimes, I thought they were also my family, but I never dared to say so. I was afraid they treated us well just because of their goodwill and never considered us part of their family.

“Mark, make a wish!”

“Yep, c’mon!”

Haley’s parents urged me while my silly brother laughed like an idiot.

To be honest, this was a total surprise for me, although these lovely people had thrown a cozy party for me every single year since my parents passed away. I was so grateful for all these blessings. But what to wish now?

“I wish everyone here, these super super super cute people in my life, I mean… the closest people… will never be my patients. They have to be healthy and strong enough, both mentally and physically, to overcome all the hardship and diseases on Earth.”

“Hey bro, what was your wish?”

That may be my brother’s first question after I entered the room. Of course, I kept quiet and gave him a mysterious smile in response.

Haley gave me a large bouquet. I had no idea of the names of the flowers. But they were all colorful.

We did have a great time then. I remembered my dreams in the past, in which we were a big family. I had two dads two moms, and Nick and Haley were my siblings. If this came true, I would love to sacrifice everything I had.

[2]

“My stupid elder brother”

If I were a writer, I would publish a book with this title. I sometimes wondered how I could live with such a nerd like him. Or maybe it was because he was too busy to live in the house with me. According to my calculation, he spent most of his time working and sleeping, so basically, we didn’t talk much. That was why I barely had conflicts despite the dissimilarities in our personalities.

The whole world knew that Haley liked my big brother, Mark. But sadly, he was the only one who seemed unaware of her feelings and dedication to him. Or, with an intelligence that enabled him to be a skillful surgeon, Mark pretended to ignore all the signs. I was confused, but that wasn’t enough to ask him.

In contrast to my nerdy elder brother, who outshone all the other kids from primary school to graduate school, I was considered “foolish” all the time. I hated studying, and doing homework was like being tortured, in my opinion. I liked playing outdoors: soccer, flying kites, etc. And I never aimed to be a doctor like Mark. He wanted to save people’s lives like a hero wearing a blouse with his sharp mind and competency, no matter how hard it was. Instead, all my hope was just to live life to the fullest: earn enough to enjoy every moment, be kind to the ones who deserve it, and die happily.

So, I decided to work in Haley’s little coffee shop. It was called “Comfy breeze”. I was the one who named the café. This was also one of my little points of pride in this sometimes dull life. It was like when I got acknowledged, which was too insignificant compared to my big brother’s countless achievements. But it was okay. I didn’t care much because Haley respected my opinion and never treated me as her servant, even when she was the one who paid me my salary. We were like friends. No, we had been friends since we were little kids.

In the past, when we were in kindergarten, our favorite game was role-playing. Mark used to be a superhero, while Haley and I would choose something more “ordinary,” including a chef, a barista, a cashier, and a coffee shop owner. Technically, all of our dreams had been realized. Working in a café allowed me to be financially independent, prove that my life was purposeful, and, more importantly: have time for the ones around me – unlike my brother.

For the most part, I didn’t think that I had to work for anyone because I liked working there. The atmosphere was comfy, especially when the air was filled with the scent of coffee and tea. Besides selling beverages, we made some cupcakes, which was Haley’s hobby. Initially, I was clumsy, so maybe her acceptance was just a random act of kindness. From then on, I tried my best to be less blundering, and as a result, I could work independently without Haley’s monitoring when she was away for a while.

Fortunately, Haley and I were in the group of “weirdo” back then when we were in school. Maybe we had the same sense of artistry, so we could easily accept one another’s creativity or “stupidity” in others’ eyes. Perhaps it was the reason why we could work well together.

As one of Haley’s childhood friends, I knew she fell head over heels in love with my brother and wanted her to be happy. Sadly, Mark was always distant and cold to everyone, and Haley was no exception. I couldn’t reveal Haley’s problem to Mark, as she once told me that she believed someday, in the not-too-distant future, he would realize it.

A stupid girl loved a silly boy. A perfect couple!

Anyway, if my memory served me right, Haley had never liked flowers. She did love something cute, like a chubby kitten, but flowers were nothing special to her. Haley once told me that flowers were too “girly” for her after she rejected a bouquet from one of our classmates during high school.

But over the past few years, Haley had decorated the café with many flowers.

I didn’t ask her about that remarkable change. I just helped her put those graceful objects into the vase carefully.

After my brother’s birthday yesterday, I was even taken aback by Haley’s announcement: she would sell flowers. That meant the current coffee shop would also be a florist’s at the same time. I didn’t care whether I would receive a pay raise for extra work. After looking through her business plan for the new florist, I nodded.

[3]

I would lie if I told the world I love money the most. Frankly speaking, it had to be Mark. Yes, seriously. I loved him. Everyone knew, but this stupid guy didn’t. I didn’t know why, or perhaps it was just a karmic relationship. If he hadn’t been a surgeon who saved several patients, I would have thought he was just a cold-blooded creature without a heart. Or was he just brainless when it came to love affairs?

Much as I detested his ignorance, I still felt blessed when I was befriended by him. He was the one who unintentionally feminized me. I used to be a boyish girl, but thanks to him, I was reminded that I’m a girl, for real.

Along with doing “boyish” stuff like practicing martial arts, free running, and things like that, I started trying crochet. It was a massive challenge for me at first. I detested sitting in a place for quite a long time while my fingers felt disobedient. But to cut a long story short, I eventually made a green turtle out of the raveled wool threads after weeks of endless endeavors. It was right before Mark’s 18th birthday, and it was also the time he was preparing for the university entrance exam.

To my surprise, Mark’s reaction was blunt. In a second, I loathed his poker face. But anyway, he did thank me for such a cute gift. I should have projected his response, so my disappointment was entirely my fault. Then, I was even more agonized when I saw Nick use the turtle as a key chain in his backpack the following day when we were heading to our extra class.

How did he get the turtle? I thought Mark and I were the only ones aware of the little gift. As friends, I asked him how he got such an adorably ugly keychain. And the answer I got was “Mark gave me without saying anything. And I think it’s cute, so I kept it as a keychain.”

From then on, I understood that Mark didn’t treasure my present – and even my presence – at all.

But it was a long time ago. Now we’re all grownups. Each of us has our own business. And I’ve recently started my additional business. My secret. No, not really. I’ve sold flowers. Gorgeous flowers. But it’s just a part of the truth. The brand new species of florals were once my pain, but now they’re my joy.

I’ve happily decorated my coffee shop with my beloved flowers. But maybe my delight wouldn’t last long. I had no idea how long I would survive. There were too many flowers, so I had to give some away. It was great to see how others kept wondering about the origin and admiring the beauty of those flowers. Perhaps my life would be fulfilled with those simple smiling faces.

 —

[4]

Then my worst nightmare did come. Haley turned out to be one of my patients. Her symptoms included coughing terribly, breathing hard, and throwing up with tiny petals scattering around. Those little petals looked so familiar…

I once saw them somewhere else. I had no clue.

But there was one thing I knew for sure. Haley was diagnosed with hanahaki.

To be honest, I didn’t know what to do. Indeed, I was sure that she loved me. It was all her unrequited love for me. I considered her my little sister, so saving her was my only wish.

There are two remedies for this kind of illness. My love for her is the first treatment. The only alternative is surgery, which is not tricky. Still, the side effect is that the patient would inevitably forget all the romantic feelings they once had – along with the flowers getting removed from their body. If I did nothing, she would pass away.

Much as my brother – Nick – scolded me, I still opted for the second solution. I had no choice. I couldn’t love the girl whom I deemed my little sister. It’s peculiar.

“You’re such a fool! Don’t you understand that Haley has loved you for over a decade? It’s like half of her life! Love her, save her, then marry her. Haley’s too good to be my sister-in-law, and you’re too stupid to be this rational!”

Aggressive words from Nick failed to change my mind. I kept my head cold as usual and carried out the operation. I just couldn’t force myself to love Haley. Maybe my life mission is to save people’s lives.

Fortunately, everything was fine. The surgery was successful, and I brought Haley back to life. I felt happy. I didn’t take Nick’s empty look into consideration. He’s too childish.

[5]

I had no idea why I was hospitalized for a while. Everyone told me that I was working too hard, getting fainted before ending up spending weeks in the hospital to revitalize. 

Coming back home, I was too excited to get back to work. My loyal customers kept asking me about the charming bouquets at my florist’s. I remembered everything, everyone around me, except the origin of those flowers. Maybe parts of my memory vanished during my days in the hospital. 

However, those elegant flowers were still there when I went to my coffee shop and florist’s. I must ask Nick how we got such aesthetic items in our place. 

“I grow the flowers, don’t you remember?” replied Nick with a reluctant smile. 

“Take me to your garden, I’ve missed something… Like… I’ve tried in vain to reminisce how it looks…”

But in return, Nick kept silent. His eyes looked sorrowful. I didn’t care much; I thought I had lost something important. I was obsessed with the strange feeling that I could never explain. 

[6]

“Nick! Are you ok?”

There was only complete silence, Nick’s dead body along with tons of pinkish petals scattering and blood in the storage room of the coffee shop. 

Haley was sobbing. She did lose one of her best friends.

Mark was petrified, looking blankly at Nick’s key chain. 

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