Update: I got an A+ in Language & Society, so maybe this long essay greatly contributed to this A+. If you read this, please don’t tell my professor that I’ve uploaded my final assignment in Language & Society on this blog. Honestly, I think this one is one of the things that I’m most proud of up till now.

SEXISM IN MUSIC: AN ANALYSIS OF TWO GENDER STEREOTYPES

I.                     Introduction

Music has been playing an indispensable role in our everyday life. As a versatile tool used to express humans’ emotions and reflect reality, it has successfully portrayed life via meaningful and straightforward lyrics and the combination of catchy melodies and mind-imprinting rhythm.

In addition, stereotyping, discrimination, or prejudice based on gender has been existing since the dawn of time due to the overgeneralization of each gender’s features. More importantly, these types of discrimination are well illustrated in several musical works of art. Therefore, sexism, to some extent, has been one of the most universal themes of endless inspiration for artists to create a great number of masterpieces.

This essay aims at investigating sexism, particularly gender stereotypes, in two chosen songs, namely “Boys don’t cry” (by The Cure) and “Hey Mama” (by David Guetta ft. Bebe Rexha, Nicky Minaj, and Afrojack). The former was published in 1979, while the latter was released 36 years later, in 2015. 

The two songs are selected due to the common gender stereotypes vividly depicted via the lyrics. The song “Boys don’t cry” was an artwork created by The Cure during the late 1970s, depicting some behaviors that were once considered “unacceptable” for boys, which will be discussed and analyzed later in this essay. Meanwhile, the second song, “Hey Mama,” was composed in the collaboration of several artists during the 2010s. In the lyrics of this song, several activities are conventionally supposed to be conducted by women, leading to a typical stereotype about females. 

Even though there is a huge gap between the release dates of these songs, this does not mean gender stereotypes or sexism in general can be terminated as time goes by.

II.                   An analysis of the lyrics of the two songs

1.       A common stereotype about boys: “Boys don’t cry”

The lyrics of this song are like a confession of a desperate boy who is conveying an unbearable pang of sorrow for letting his girlfriend go, yet he could do nothing but hide his distress along with his sincere tears:

“I would say I’m sorry

If I thought that it would change your mind

But I know that this time

I have said too much

Been too unkind

I tried to laugh about it

Cover it all up with lies

I tried to laugh about it

Hiding the tears in my eyes

‘Cause boys don’t cry

Boys don’t cry

I would break down at your feet

And beg forgiveness, plead with you

But I know that it’s too late

And now there’s nothing I can do

I would tell you that I loved you

If I thought that you would stay

But I know that it’s no use

And you’ve already gone away

Misjudged your limits

Pushed you too far

Took you for granted

Thought that you needed me more, more, more

Now I would do almost anything

To get you back by my side

But I just keep on laughing

Hiding the tears in my eyes

‘Cause boys don’t cry”

It can be implied that the boy was wrong when he was too unkind to his girlfriend, taking her for granted, and that is the raison d’être for his regret. No matter how miserable he felt, he could try everything in vain to get her back to his side. It was too late then. Breakups among couples are ordinary incidents, and as human beings, everyone can be disappointed in them. However, unlike girls, who are often considered weak and fragile, boys tend to hide their actual emotions due to the social stereotype of a strong figure. And the male character in the song is no exception.

This is best described in the following part:

“Now I would do most anything

To get you back by my side

But I just keep on laughing

Hiding the tears in my eyes

‘Cause boys don’t cry”

Within the three lines, it is apparent that from the point of view of the main character, boys normally do not cry, and this is as concrete as a commonly agreed fact. The use of the present simple tense is evidence of that. The boy tries his best to refrain from shedding tears by keeping on laughing. It is a testimony to what is called “toxic masculinity.” 

Smith, a member of The Cure, once said in an interview with Rolling Stone, “And as an English boy at the time, you’re encouraged not to show your emotion to any degree. And I couldn’t help but show my emotions when I was younger. I never found it awkward showing my emotions. I couldn’t really continue without showing my emotions; you’d have to be a pretty boring singer to do that. So I kind of made a big thing about it. I thought, ‘Well, it’s part of my nature to rail against being told not to do something”. (Smith, 2019)

When the song was composed in 1979, gender stereotype was once a formidable barrier, especially for boys, to show their sadness by shedding tears. Even today, during the 2020s, sometimes we may overhear someone cheering somebody else up by saying something like this:

“It’s alright, don’t be sad. And don’t cry. Boys have to be strong, and crying is so weak. It’s just for girls. Don’t be like girls.” 

Without a doubt, one of the most natural reactions of the human body – crying when being sad – is forbidden when it comes to boys. It is quite unfair to boys because, just like other activities such as eating and sleeping, crying is necessary sometimes for all genders, and it is not just limited to anyone. 

In short, “Boys don’t cry” is an emotional song that voices a boy’s distress over his breakup when he does his best to prevent himself from crying, owing to the deep-seated belief that boys are not allowed to cry as it is a sign of weakness. From the language used in the song, we do understand the fact that sexism was not just against females, but males are also a victim of it due to “toxic masculinity”. 

2.       A common stereotype about girls: “Hey Mama”

In contrast to the heart-to-heart confession of a boy to his ex-girlfriend in the former song, the lyrics of this song – “Hey Mama” – can be understood as a two-way conversation between two lovers – a man and a woman.

All the man said was just:

“Be my woman, girl, I’mma be your man

Be my woman, girl, I’ll be your man”

which is then repeated several times during the whole song. And what the woman replied is indicated as follows:

“Yes I’ll be your woman

Yes I’ll be your baby

Yes I’ll be whatever that you tell me when you ready

Yes I’ll be your girl, forever your lady

You ain’t never gotta worry, I’m down for you baby

Best believe that when you need that

I’ll provide that you will always have it

I’ll be on deck, keep it in check

When you need that I’mma let you have it

Yes I do the cooking

Yes I do the cleaning

Yes I keep the nana real sweet for your eating

Yes you be the boss yes I’ll be respecting

Whatever that you tell me ’cause it’s game you be spitting

[…]

I wanna hear you calling my name

Like hey mama mama hey mama mama (Hey)”

All the artists (David Guetta, Bebe Rexha, Nicky Minaj, and Afrojack) working on this song are bold feminists, which is well depicted by their works and opinions shared on social networking sites and interviews. However, some of the lines may sound contradictory to their artistic mindset. Personally, I reckon that they created it on purpose. 

Initially, it may seem that the woman just tried to be as acquiescent as much as she could:

“Yes I’ll be whatever that you tell me when you ready

You ain’t never gotta worry, I’m down for you baby

Best believe that when you need that

I’ll provide that you will always have it

I’ll be on deck, keep it in check

When you need that I’mma let you have it

Yes I do the cooking

Yes I do the cleaning

Yes I keep the nana real sweet for your eating

Yes you be the boss yes I’ll be respecting…”

From the lyrics of the song, it is obvious that the woman promised to please the man in every single aspect of their everyday life, from doing housework, being in charge of childbearing, and even sexual activities.  

There is still a universal belief that it is women’s duty to complete household chores and satisfy all their counterparts’ needs. Therefore, when the woman said: 

“Yes I do the cooking

Yes I do the cleaning…”

this can be a sign of her loyalty to the man. 

Contrary to the old-fashioned belief that women were supposed to be tractable and inferior to their male counterparts, romantic relationship in this day and age seems to be equal without any dominant role. However, from the abovementioned lines, the audience is aware that the woman was willing to be the underdog in her relationship, always ready to fulfill all the demands from her beau. Nevertheless, this strategy is skillfully employed by the artists behind this track to accomplish their artistic goals and convey their gender equality messages. 

Straightforward as it may seem, the song is conveying a hidden meaning, implied through the punchline: 

“I wanna hear you calling my name

Like hey mama mama mama hey mama mama (Hey)” 

These sentences are used for a mocking purpose. It shouts out:

“The perfect woman who can do everything for you without complaining is your beloved mother who gives birth to you, boy!”

Some argue that this song is full of dirty slang and taboo words to conceal metaphoric images about sexual activities. This is even clearer when we watch certain Vietnamese subtitle videos on YouTube. Notwithstanding, I personally lean towards another way of interpreting its meaning. From my perspective, the woman in the song just pretended to be so obedient and respectful to her man, alluring him to think that he was the person who controlled everything, yet the mastermind was her. 

In general, from the woman’s viewpoint, the man is foolish, and she herself is the very game controller. They may have fun together, and she can act compliant like he is her boss, yet she asks the man to call her “Mama” to claim her ultimate supremacy over him.

III.                 Conclusion

To reiterate, the song “Boys don’t cry”, which is an alternative/indie song created by The Cure in the late 1970s, along with the song “Hey Mama,” an EDM-rap song produced by David Guetta featuring Nicki Minaj and others, are the two typical examples of how sexism is conveyed in works of art. From the two chosen songs that I have analyzed, it is evident that regardless of the time period (during the 1990s or 2010s) or genre (alternative/indie or EDM/rap), music is still a powerful and influential tool used for displaying a reality in which gender stereotypes do exist.  

References

The Cure. (1979). Boys don’t cry [Recorded by The Cure]. West Sussex, England.

David Guetta, G. T. (2015). Hey Mama [Recorded by Nicki Minaj, Bebe Rexha]. Brooklyn, New York City, United States of America.

Smith, R. (2019). The Cure’s Robert Smith Looks Back: ‘I’ve Never Thought About Legacy’. (K. Grow, Interviewer)

I drew this, and it looks so stupid: